For those of us in a continuing search for reasons to get out of bed each day, the MAX lines (Metropolitan Area Express -- who knew "Xpress" would need an "E"?) offer a never-ending source of entertainment if you look without staring. Corner-of-the-eye shots. Or, better yet, window reflections. Avoid eye contact. Eye sweeps with head swivels work. It's all in 3-D with surround sound and you can choose the extent to which you want to get intertwined in the action. Bold voice involvements must use the Kathleen McNeal technique of friendly assumption that you and the other person have been pals for fifteen or twenty years. "Hey, nice shirt. It goes with the color of your dog." The person's response will let you know whether to proceed or STFU.
You can choose which theatre to visit: the Red Line will offer international fare as it freights people to and from the airport, and sizing up the luggage of the travelers invites speculation about what's going on with them. The out-the-window scenery along the Red Line from Gateway TC to the terminal is dull-minus.
You can't miss on the Green Line coming from and going to Clackamas Town Center. So-so scenery but a good rolling zoo. Twenty minutes from the Gateway TC.
The Blue Line comes in two flavors: East and West. Blue Line West moves through a lot of high number real estate and gets a favorable rating for scenery but a thumbs-down for people watching. The tattoos are pedestrian at best and wardrobe fashion is high-normal. The most interesting part of your ride will be the long, long tunnel under the West Hills. There is a station partway through where you can get off and take a long, no-stop lift to the Portland Zoo (animal kind with lions and tigers and bears) or stay on the station platform and check out the core sample that was drilled from the top of the mountain to the tunnel level. It's in a long, long, long, long glass tube where you can examine the strata the engineers had to deal with in this big dig.
But Blue Line East is where the fun is: Going to or coming from Gresham (part of the challenge is figuring out where the town is) presents the opportunity to immerse yourself in the human comedy.
Lots of dumpster divers with their dirigible-size can and bottle collections. Next week's blog will cover some of the others: the guy ahead of me to the left whose head looks like a Kansas wheat field in the tenth month of drought. The dude in a wife-beater top (Gresham proud). Bike people. Stay tuned.
