Do you know anyone named Jesse? Neither do I. I wonder why parents stopped naming their little boy babies Jesse. It really is a fine name that is easy to spell and easy to remember. When you hear the name you probably think of either Jesse James or Jesse Owens, both of whom made their claim to fame way, way back in those other centuries.
It is my belief that Jesse James owes his notoriety in large measure to the alliteration of the two names. After he robbed a bank or a train his name just rolled off the tongues of the lawmen. "Yes, it was Jesse James who shot the engineer. Jesse James." If Jesse had been born to Ethyl and Ignatius Snodgrasse the lawmen would would have just said, "Yeah, it looks like it was Snodgrasse on the train shoot."
A case could be made for calling Jesse Owens the greatest athlete of all time. In the 1936 Olympics, Jesse set five world records and tied a sixth, all in the space of about 21 minutes. His long jump record stood for 25 years. One might surmise that the next 9,827 boy babies born after Owens dazzled the Olympic spectators (except you, Adolph) would have had "Jesse" inscribed on the birth certificates. Didn't happen.
Then there was Jesse Applegate who made his bones on the Oregon Trail by blazing a southern trail across the Cascade Mountains into the Willamette Valley thereby giving settlers an easier option than the dangerous Barlow Trail or the treacherous Columbia River. A southern Oregon river bears his name and his grave is the only interesting attraction in Yoncalla, Oregon.
So come on people, now, (remember that early '70s song by Jesse Colin Young?) let's all get together and do right by the name, "Jesse." How about a baby boy, Jesse Jones? Or a Jesse Jerome (instead of Harry Jerome)? Does anyone have "Hesse" as a last name? That would be cool. Jesse Hesse.
Oh, wait...Holy sh--! JESSE HELMS. Yikes. OK. Class dismissed. Enough with the Jesses. Stick with Johns and Jons and Michaels. No more Jesses.
